Funny Cat Names

40 hand-picked funny cat names from the Name Vault — plus how to make one stick.

How to Pick One

Say it out loud to a vet receptionist before you commit, because that is the real test for anything on this list. Chairman Meow and Purrlock Holmes pass for most people. Notorious C.A.T. does not survive being spelled over the phone. Anderson Pooper is the one you should imagine being called across a full waiting room before you sign anything. Beyond that, there are two distinct kinds of funny here. The celebrity puns, Catrick Swayze, Fuzz Aldrin, Vincent Van Furr, Brad Kitt, are jokes that get told once and then get shortened, usually to something ordinary. The food names, Taco, Meatball, Pickles, Gnocchi, Waffles and Beans, are the ones that age well, because they stop being a joke around month two and simply become the cat's name. A practical note: whatever the long form, the call-name should be two syllables ending in a bright vowel.

FAQ

How do I choose the right funny cat name?

Say your top three out loud at feeding time — the one that feels natural to call across a room is the winner. Two-syllable names ending in a bright vowel get the fastest response.

Will I regret a funny cat name?

Sometimes, and the pattern is predictable. Jokes that depend on a reference date badly, and any name you have to explain becomes tiring by the tenth explanation. The names that survive are the ones that work as plain names once the humour wears off, which is why Pickles and Meatball outlast Anderson Pooper. Say it to a receptionist, a neighbour and a child before you commit.

Does a pun name confuse a cat?

No, but it usually gets shortened, so decide now what it will be shortened to. Chairman Meow becomes Meow, Purrlock Holmes becomes Holmes, Hairy Potter becomes Harry. The cat learns that daily call-form, not the full joke on the paperwork. Choose a pun whose short form is a sound you actually like calling, and use it consistently from the first week.

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